The Psychology of your 20s

Social comparison is the thief of joy - it will make us question everything that we have, doubt our own abilities, steal our sense of gratitude and peace. It also sometimes feels impossible to escape, especially in our 20s when we look to others for confirmation that we are doing something right. In today's episode we break down the 5 rules you need to stop comparing yourself to others and embrace the benefits of healthy social comparison, this includes: 

1. Don't unfollow, don't suppress, recognise and expand
2. Keep your judgements realistic 
3. Do things for YOU first
4. Water your own grass 
5. Comparison as a motivator 

Listen now to learn how you can control your urge to compare yourself to others! 

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Our inability to make decisions is wasting our time, keeping us acting from a place of fear and stuck in a life we don't want! It's also not entirely our fault and often stems from unconscious mechanisms, neuroticism and fears that we haven't recognised. In today's episode we break down: 

• Why you struggle to make decisions
• The consequences of our chronic indecisiveness 
• Perfection and indecision 
• Choice overload 
• A fear of failure 
• How to overcome your indecisiveness using the 80/20 rule
• The 'trusted advisor' method 

Listen now! 

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About 2/3rds of couples start off as friends according to recent research. But developing feelings for a friend isn't always a happily ever after situation. In today's episode we break down why it is that we fall in love with our friends, the principles of attraction such as the similarity liking effect and mere exposure effect, whether to say anything or keep it to yourself, managing the pain of rejection or social loss and your best tips for protecting the friendship and your own heart. Listen now! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg 

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Sleep is one of our most vital functions but how many of us actually know that much about it, the links to our physical functioning, mental health, relationships and overall wellbeing. What about some of the strange experiments they've conducted to investigate dreams or how long we can go without sleep? In today's episode we take a deep dive into the psychology of sleep, including: 

• Why we need sleep?
• What actually is REM sleep?
• The Russian Sleep Experiment 
• Sleep debt 
• Sleep as a form of self sabotage
• Revenge bedtime procrastination 
• The impact of blue light and screens in the bedroom 
• How to improve your sleep hygiene and more 

Listen now for when you want to maximise your shut eye! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg 

Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast

For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

More and more 20 something year olds are choosing to live with their parents; we are moving out later and a lot of us are boomeranging (coming back home after moving out). In today's episode we explore the emotional and psychological impacts of living with your parents in your 20s, why more of us are living at home because of financial anxiety or housing insecurity, how to handle conflict with your parents whilst you're still living under their roof and 6 tips for a successful living at home situation + some of your stories, advice and the benefits. 

Listen now! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg 

Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com

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We lose our spark and love for life for many reasons: burnout, mental ill health, people pleasing, a breakup. When we do it can feel like life gets very boring, it loses colour, we lose interest and we can become cynical towards all of the small joys and brilliance of being alive and being human. In this episode we break down six tips for getting your spark back: 

• The power of rest
• Choosing to live light versus live heavy 
• Reconnecting with your inner child + play 
• Seeking inspiration in the mundane and The Alchemist 
• Exercise + the healing power of nature 
• Ignoring the urge to compare 

Listen now for when you're in a rut or have lost your spark! 

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You're not going to get along with everyone and one of those people you don't get along with might end up dating someone you love i.e your friend. Disliking your friends partner often stems from one of three reasons: your dating preferences don't match, you're experiencing platonic jealousy, you're genuinely worried about this other person being bad for your friend, exploitative or abusive. We talk about all three of these outcomes in today's episode along with what to do in response: do you stay silent or speak up? 

Listen now! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

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Social media is impacting our mental health in ways we are not ready or willing to acknowledge, and it's time we talk about it. In today's episode we discuss all the psychology of social media and how it is embedded in our social lives, our relationships, our beliefs, our daily routines, our news and our self worth. We break down how social media was designed to be addictive, how it captures more of our time than we think, the differences between people who have been on social media for over 10 years versus who have never been and what we can do about it. We also discuss the role of algorithms and misinformation. There is so much negativity spread online and innate need to compare ourselves to others, but I also believe we can have a positive and moderated relationship with these platforms. Listen now. 

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Father wounds arise from a disorganised or complicated relationship with our father figure - either due to them being physically or emotionally absent, harsh and critical, unfeeling or abusive and can result in a number of dysfunctional behaviours and emotional patterns as we grow older. In this episode we are breaking down the psychology of father wounds and discussing: 

• The origins of father wounds and the role of generational trauma
• Mother wounds versus father wounds 
• Attachment theory and father archetypes 
• Father hunger and father replacements 
• Is forgiveness the only answer? 
• The power of inner child healing 

All of that and more, listen now! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

Business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode we are joined by clinical psychologist and author of 'The Defining Decade' to talk about all the frustrations, stressors, misconceptions and hard moments of our 20s and why it's only going to get BETTER from here. We talk about: 

• Shifting from a 'what if' to a 'what is' or 'what else' mindset
• Why we fear uncertainity 
• Milestone anxiety 
• Sliding versus deciding 
• Catastrophic thinking 
• Insecure and anxious attachment styles vs. insecure and anxious moments
• And so much more 

Listen now to hear all of Dr Meg's amazing advice and hear a bit about her new book, coming out next month. 

Link to The Defining Decade: https://www.amazon.com.au/Defining-Decade-Meg-Jay/dp/0446561754 

Pre-order Meg's new book: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Twentysomething-Treatment/Meg-Jay/9781668012291 

Follow Jemma here: @jemmasbeg 

Follow the podcast here: @thatpsychologypodcast 

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Sometimes all we want to do is a have a big, old fashioned sob and when we can't it leads us feeling emotionally pent up, defective and frustrated. There's an explanation for why we go through periods where we are unable to cry. In today's episode we discuss: 

• The evolutionary function of crying
• Crying as an attachment behaviour 
• The difference between basal, reflex and emotional tears 
• The 4 major reasons we struggle with crying 
• How to heal your connection with your emotions 
• How we process emotions through the body, and more.

Listen now when you're in need of an emotional catharsis or could really do with a few tears. 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

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Self discipline is the key ingredient to unlocking everything you want in life. But despite that many of us treat it like its optional and believe the narrative that self discipline requires perfection, requires sacrifice and is too hard. Actually, self discipline is anything but, it is actually the road of least resistance. In this episode we break down 5 tips for building self discipline in any area of life: 

1. Understanding your motivation
2. Leveraging social accountability and desirability bias 
3. The power of micro habits 
4. Hacking our dopamine systems through instant versus delayed gratification
5. Shifting from learned helplessness to learned industriousness 

All of that and more! Listen now!

Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast

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Love is scary. There are so many opportunities to be hurt, to be let down, to have thing turn out in a way we never wanted them to. But it's also one of the best things in live and brings incredible joy and fulfilment. Why is it that some of us avoid the experience all together. In today's episode we are going to discuss the fear of intimacy in all its forms. We will discuss: 

• Signs you have a fear of intimacy (serial dating, situationships, emotional avoidance)
• Childhood and early relationship wounds
• The fear of engulfment and overbearing parents 
• How insecurity drives protectiveness 
• Our misconceptions about love 
• 4 steps to healing your fear of intimacy

We also discuss some of the ways people in their 20s might not realise they have a fear of intimacy and why our society sometimes celebrates the things that keep us in a state of avoidance. All of that and more, listen now! 

Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast 

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This International Women's Day as part of iHeart's Women Take the Mic Initiative, I'm bringing on my Mum for a vulnerable chat about our relationship as mother and daughter, what she's learned from being a mother, what she would do differently, life lessons and her success in a male dominated field. We discuss everything from motherhood, child-parent dynamics, feminism and career advice. It's a beautiful conversation, one that I'll hold dearly for a long time and we hope you enjoy, listen now! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week we are discussing the ups and downs of living alone in your 20s: from the freedom and independence, to the loneliness and social isolation, financial anxiety and stress, but the authenticity and emotional maturity that comes with it. We talk about: 

• Why being alone doesn't make you lonely
• Sliders versus deciders - why you should wait before moving in with a partner
• Cognitive distortions and overspending 
• Lifestyle creep 
• Habits for building social connection and community
• How to successfully live alone 

All that and more, listen now! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

Follow The Psychology of your 20s on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Feeling jealous over our partners past can feel highly irrational, but its still a feeling many of us have and contributes to a lot of obsessive and unhealthy behaviours like stalking their exes, asking intrusive questions, starting arguments in hopes of getting the reassurance we need. In today's episode, we talk about the psychology of retroactive jealousy, including its origins and how to move past your jealous feelings. We will talk about: 

• How past relationships and trauma create jealousy
• Overthinking and anxiety 
• Rejection sensitivity 
• Self sabotage 
• Interrupting mental compulsions 

Listen now! 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg 

Follow The Psychology of your 20s on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Panic attacks are awful, they sneak up on us in the worst moments and make us feel overwhelmed by an invisible fear. In today's episode we are going to talk through the psychology of panic attacks including: 

• Why they occur?
• Panic disorders vs. panic attacks 
• The flight, fight, freeze or fawn response
• The car alarm analogy 
• The function of anxiety and panic
• Anxiety avoidance vs. acceptance
• 7 evidence based tips for managing panic attacks 

We also have a 7 minute meditation at the end of the episode that will talk you through a visualisation exercise for managing an actual panic attack. Listen now! 

If you need immediate help please call your local crisis centre or access the following resources: 

• 988 Mental Health Emergency Hotline (US)
• 13 11 14 Lifeline (Australia) 
• https://www.nhs.uk/service-search/mental-health/find-an-urgent-mental-health-helpline (UK) 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg 

Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

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It's my birthday. Let's talk about my fear of growing older. 

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Our 20s are one of the best times for us to change careers. Perhaps you're feeling burntout, bored, unmotivated, craving something bigger, something with purpose or better hours, a change from the life and job you currently have. In this episode we break down how we can change careers in our 20s, some of the challenges, how to manage the financial insecurity, the signs your old job is not right for you and discovering your true mission and purpose and life (even if it doesn't always revolve around your job and a pay check). 

We are joined by the founder and CEO of The Career Contessa, host of the hit podcast and author, Lauren Goodwin who shares her years worth of advice and best tips. 

Follow Career Contessa here: @CareerContessa 

Listen to the podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/0k0EzNNiLnWICq7gQuFQFg?si=3b84c545aea54800 

Follow Jemma here: @jemmasbeg

Follow The Psychology of your 20s here: @thatpsychologypodcast

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Acne has just as many emotional and mental symptoms as it does physical. Having acne in our 20s is a significant source of insecurity, frustration and hopelessness, impacting how we go about making new friends, dating, career opportunities and so much more. In this episode we break down the psychology of acne, investigating the myths about the causes of acne, the subsequent stigma towards acne, the mental consequences we are observing more and more, the impact of social media and facetune, along with how we can manage our self esteem in the face of chronic acne. Listen now! 

The article I reference: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5029236/ 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

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