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    How to Believe in Yourself

    Sometimes, unlearning old techniques and embracing new skills can feel counterintuitive, but persisting through the discomfort can lead to great success. Seeking guidance from various sources can also be beneficial in achieving one's goals.

    enDecember 18, 2023

    About this Episode

    When was the last time you set a goal and struggled to reach it? Perhaps you're trying to write a novel but can't seem to get started. Or maybe you want to master a sport, but you keep making the same mistakes over and over again. This week, organizational psychologist Adam Grant guides us through the science of human potential, and teaches us how to uncover our own abilities.

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    🔑 Key Takeaways

    • Believe in yourself, challenge limitations, and embrace determination to unlock your hidden potential and achieve greatness.
    • Feeling stuck and encountering obstacles can disrupt our focus and motivation, but it is crucial to recognize and overcome them in order to move forward.
    • Perseverance and dedication can help overcome obstacles and achieve great results, even in the face of adversity.
    • Perseverance and determination, combined with focusing on areas for improvement, can lead to remarkable achievements, even in the face of doubt and lack of natural talent or skills.
    • Embrace imperfections, seek advice from relatable mentors, and find balance between pushing for excellence and embracing growth.
    • Success involves setbacks and non-linear progress, so it's important to be kind to ourselves, embrace new perspectives, and try different approaches when facing challenges.
    • Sometimes, achieving our goals requires us to pause, reassess, and explore new approaches. By remaining adaptable and open to learning, we can overcome challenges and reach our full potential.
    • Procrastination can serve as a strategy to avoid negative emotions linked to a task, but it can also offer opportunities for personal growth, increased creativity, and better problem-solving.
    • Taking breaks, being intrinsically motivated, and embracing flexibility and curiosity can enhance creativity, fulfillment, and lead to unexpected paths and discoveries.
    • When seeking guidance or mentorship, it is important to find someone who can provide general direction and guidance rather than specific instructions tailored to their own journey.
    • Sometimes, unlearning old techniques and embracing new skills can feel counterintuitive, but persisting through the discomfort can lead to great success. Seeking guidance from various sources can also be beneficial in achieving one's goals.
    • Having diverse mentors can provide different perspectives and increase career success, while perseverance and a strong support system are vital in achieving goals.
    • Progress is not solely about reaching the end goal, but also about the ability to overcome obstacles and grow through setbacks along the way.

    📝 Podcast Summary

    Unleashing the Power Within

    We are often capable of more than we think. The stories of ordinary people summoning extraordinary strength and defying odds show us the untapped potential within ourselves. Whether it's a mother lifting a car to save her child or individuals overcoming physical limitations to achieve greatness, these examples remind us of the power of determination and belief. We should question our self-imposed limitations and ask ourselves what we can accomplish if we truly set our minds and hearts to it. It's important to recognize that the biggest obstacle to reaching our potential is often ourselves. By overcoming fear, doubt, and getting started on the journey, we can unlock our hidden potential and achieve greatness.

    Overcoming obstacles to break free from stagnation and achieve success.

    Feeling stuck comes with a psychological cost. When we find ourselves in a state of stagnation and emptiness, known as languishing, it disrupts our focus and motivation. We may feel like we're stuck, which further keeps us from progressing. This is exemplified by Adam Grant's experience of being unable to finish a chapter on getting unstuck in his book. He spent weeks spinning his wheels and eventually had to put it away. Additionally, achieving success can create mental blocks. Athlete RA Dickey, who had a promising career, experienced this after being drafted by the Texas Rangers. A strange X-ray finding in his arm derailed his progress. These stories emphasize the importance of recognizing and overcoming the obstacles that keep us stuck.

    Overcoming Setbacks: A Story of Determination and Success

    Setbacks and failures are not the end of the road. RA's story shows us that even when it seems like there is nowhere else to go but down, there is still potential for growth and success. Despite being born without a ligament, RA pursued his dream of becoming a major league pitcher. He faced numerous challenges, including a significant cut in his signing bonus and being sent back to the minors multiple times. However, he didn't give up. RA pushed himself harder than ever, practicing relentlessly and honing his skills. Eventually, he achieved success, surpassing expectations and proving his doubters wrong. This story reminds us that determination, resilience, and hard work can lead to extraordinary results, even in the face of adversity.

    Overcoming Challenges and Prioritizing Growth over Perfection

    Ambitious goals require perseverance and a growth mindset. Adam Grant's experience in diving teaches us that even if we lack natural talent or skills, grit and determination can lead to remarkable achievements. Despite being told he lacked the qualities of a successful diver, Grant refused to give up and embraced the challenge. However, he also learned the importance of focusing on the right areas for improvement. Instead of perfecting easy dives, he should have dedicated his time to developing his weaker areas, such as his vertical leap. This story reminds us that success often comes from hard work, resilience, and prioritizing growth over perfection.

    The Pitfalls of Perfectionism and Seeking Expert Advice

    Perfectionism can hinder our potential for growth. Perfectionists often get caught up in obsessing over insignificant details and miss out on the bigger picture. They also tend to narrow their areas of growth, fearing failure and staying within their comfort zones. Additionally, perfectionists are prone to berating themselves for past mistakes, which doesn't lead to improvement but rather leaves them bruised. Another common mistake is seeking advice from experts. Surprisingly, research shows that learning from experts may not always yield the best results. Experts can struggle to relate to beginners because they know too much and have a hard time breaking down complex concepts. Lastly, pushing through roadblocks by becoming our own drill sergeants may not be the most effective approach. It's important to find the right balance between striving for excellence and allowing ourselves room for growth and learning.

    Embracing the Non-linear Path to Success

    Pushing ourselves too hard and being harsh on ourselves may not always lead to desired outcomes. It can result in burnout, boredom, and limit our ability to explore new perspectives. Instead of expecting a linear path to success, it is important to recognize that success often involves loops, dips, and setbacks. The journey towards our goals can be squiggly and jagged, requiring us to take a step back in order to move forward. A study on skill improvement found that people often experience a dip before making significant progress. So, it is important to embrace the idea that not every step will be forward and to be open to trying new methods or approaches when faced with challenges.

    Embracing Change: A Key to Unlocking Potential

    Sometimes in order to achieve our goals and reach our potential, we need to slow down and reevaluate our methods. It's easy to get stuck and feel like we've hit our peak, but often it's just a matter of needing to try a different approach. We might think that pushing ourselves harder, focusing solely on the task, or seeking expert advice will be the answer, but these strategies are not always as effective as they seem. Instead, we should be open to learning new techniques and finding better ways to tap into our potential. By being adaptable and willing to go back to the drawing board, we can overcome challenges and achieve greater things.

    The Surprising Benefits and Motivational Potential of Procrastination

    Procrastination may not always be a sign of laziness or lack of motivation. Psychologists have found that people often procrastinate to avoid negative emotions associated with a task, such as boredom, confusion, fear, or anxiety. However, there can be unexpected benefits of procrastination. Taking a detour and engaging in a serious hobby unrelated to work can build a sense of self-efficacy and boost confidence. This, in turn, can recharge motivation and have a positive impact when returning to the primary domain. Additionally, research suggests that there is a sweet spot of procrastination for creativity. People who put things off a little bit tend to be more creative compared to those who don't procrastinate or those who constantly delay tasks. Finding the right balance allows for incubation time and the development of better ideas.

    The power of breaks and intrinsic motivation in stimulating creativity and finding unexpected solutions.

    Taking breaks and allowing ourselves to procrastinate can actually stimulate creativity and lead to unexpected solutions. However, this only works if we are intrinsically motivated by the task at hand and genuinely interested in finding a solution. Sometimes, we need to give ourselves the space and time to figure out the most promising ideas instead of rushing to get things done quickly. This concept, known as the plunging in bias, suggests that while we should be quick to start, we should also ensure that we're not too quick to finish. Additionally, being driven by harmonious passion, where we genuinely enjoy and challenge ourselves in tasks, can lead to a greater sense of fulfillment and flow, compared to being solely focused on the outcome. Finally, it's important to remember that success doesn't always follow a predetermined roadmap, and embracing flexibility and curiosity can lead to unexpected paths and discoveries.

    Seek a compass, not a map, for guidance and mentorship

    When looking for guidance or mentorship, it's important to seek a compass, not a map. A map may provide specific directions, but it may not be tailored for your unique journey. Experts and mentors have different skills, strengths, and challenges, which means their map may not be suitable for your path. A compass, on the other hand, gives you direction and tells you if you're heading in the right way. Just like Aria Dickey, who received advice from pitching coaches, sometimes a compass can redirect you towards a new path or opportunity. While the coaches didn't have experience with a knuckle ball, they provided him with a general direction to explore and experiment. So, when seeking guidance, remember that a compass can give you the guidance you need to find your own way.

    Challenging Habits and Embracing Change: Ra Dickey's Journey to Success

    Sometimes in order to succeed, we have to challenge our ingrained habits and make radical adjustments. Ra Dickey's journey to becoming a successful Major League pitcher exemplifies this. He had to unlearn his old pitching techniques and learn a completely new skill of throwing the knuckleball, which goes against everything he knew. Despite feeling like he was going backward and getting worse along the way, Dickey persisted and eventually achieved great success. His story teaches us that making it feel wrong and overcorrecting can lead to the right outcome. Additionally, Dickey's approach of seeking guidance from multiple sources instead of relying on a single mentor proved valuable, as demonstrated by a study on lawyers navigating their path to partner.

    The Power of Multiple Mentors and Perseverance

    Having multiple mentors can greatly increase your chances of career success. Adam Grant explains that having different mentors with different perspectives and guidance can provide you with a variety of maps to navigate your career path. This is supported by research that shows individuals with two or three mentors are more likely to climb the corporate ladder and reach their goals. Similarly, Allison Levine's story teaches us the importance of perseverance and a sense of purpose. Despite facing physical obstacles and having to quit just 300 feet from the summit of Mount Everest, she was encouraged by a friend to keep trying. This shows us that having a strong support system and a drive to achieve our goals can lead us to accomplish great things.

    The Importance of Resilience in the Journey of Progress

    Progress is not always about reaching the destination, but about bouncing back from obstacles and continuing to move forward. Allison's journey to climb Mount Everest and complete the Adventures Grand Slam exemplifies this idea. Despite facing numerous health conditions, doubts from others, and literal moments of being stuck, she persevered and ultimately achieved her goals. She realized that the true measure of progress is not only reaching the summit, but also the distance she traveled from the point where she had to turn around. This highlights the significance of resilience and the growth that comes from overcoming setbacks. Progress is not always a linear path, but rather a combination of peaks reached and values crossed.

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