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🔑 Key Takeaways

  1. Even in difficult circumstances, finding motivation and creating a plan can lead to significant personal and professional growth. Say yes to opportunities and embrace uncertainty for continuous self-discovery.
  2. Setting boundaries with family members is crucial for self-preservation and preventing toxic dynamics, and can lead to valuable life lessons and personal growth.
  3. Parental support and belief in children's passions can give them the confidence to pursue their dreams and navigate through difficult situations, emphasizing the value of a strong parental bond.
  4. Recognizing toxic relationships and choosing personal growth over negative influences can lead to improved mental well-being and happiness.
  5. Jaackmaate's childhood experiences and struggles at home shaped his desire for attention and fitting in, but YouTube served as an outlet for him to overcome these challenges and find his identity.
  6. Jaackmaate reflects on his anger issues, fake content, and personal growth journey, emphasizing the importance of authenticity and having a genuine purpose.
  7. Being true to oneself and focusing on personal growth are essential for finding success and happiness in any career, as highlighted by Jaackmaate's experience on YouTube.
  8. True happiness and fulfillment come from enjoying the journey, celebrating small victories, and embracing new experiences, rather than solely focusing on the end goal.
  9. Money can bring happiness by providing the freedom to help and support loved ones, and making a positive impact on the lives of others is more valuable than material possessions.
  10. Financial freedom not only relieves stress and anxiety, but also enables us to support our loved ones during tough times, bringing fulfillment and purpose to our lives.
  11. Jaackmaate acknowledges the hard work it took to achieve his success and feels a sense of guilt and struggle with imposter syndrome. He finds fulfillment in helping others and recognizes the importance of his team's support.
  12. Authenticity and pursuing true passions are essential for sustained fulfillment and success in creative pursuits.
  13. Online criticism and trolling can have detrimental effects on an individual's mental and emotional state, emphasizing the importance of maintaining control over one's emotions to navigate the online world successfully.
  14. Being an influencer comes with the responsibility of managing audience behavior and expectations, which can be challenging and emotionally draining due to the potential for criticism and negative comments.
  15. Jaackmaate's persistence and passion for interviewing led him to rediscover his love for YouTube, gain credibility through notable guest interviews, and build trust with his audience through honesty about his decision-making process.
  16. Jaackmaate chose to sign an exclusive deal with Spotify, sacrificing full visual episodes on YouTube for financial benefits, aiming to secure a better future for himself and his children.
  17. Mental health battles can greatly affect daily life, but seeking help and prioritizing mental well-being are crucial for managing and overcoming these challenges.
  18. Openness about mental health struggles can provide support to others, though seeking professional help is essential, it is important to address mental health concerns to live a healthier life.
  19. Living with mental health struggles can be challenging, pushing individuals to develop unique coping mechanisms like self-medication and distraction, emphasizing the importance of understanding and support.
  20. Having a partner who listens, supports, and encourages can help navigate anxieties, overcome obstacles, and boost mental well-being.
  21. Prioritizing love, connection, and family can lead to personal growth and happiness. Balancing personal ambition and strong relationships is key to a fulfilling life.
  22. Jaackmaate has found his niche and talent in connecting and entertaining through talking, proving that passion and skill go hand in hand for success.
  23. Being open about struggles not only helps individuals in their personal growth and therapy, but also inspires and connects with others, creating a ripple effect of empathy and understanding.

📝 Podcast Summary

A Journey of Overcoming Challenges and Discovering Self

Jaackmaate's upbringing and strained relationship with his mother have had a significant impact on his life and career. Jaackmaate explains that his mother did not understand or support his potential as a YouTuber, leading to conflicts and eventually being kicked out of his home. However, he found motivation to take YouTube seriously and pursue it as a career when he was at a crossroads, living in a less-than-ideal environment. He bought a whiteboard and created a plan, committing to saying yes to any opportunities that came his way. This decision marked a turning point for him, propelling him into a world of uncertainties and continuous self-discovery.

Establishing Boundaries in Challenging Family Relationships

Setting boundaries is essential, even with family members. Both Steven Bartlett and Jaackmaate share similar experiences of having challenging relationships with their mothers. They discuss the difficulty of deciding when to reconcile and how to protect themselves from being hurt again. Steven emphasizes the importance of establishing boundaries not only with friends but also with family members to prevent getting sucked back into toxic dynamics. Jaackmaate also mentions the impact of his father's past and how he learned valuable life lessons and morals from him. This conversation highlights the significance of self-preservation and the need to prioritize one's well-being when dealing with complex family relationships.

The Importance of Parental Support during Challenging Times

Parental support and understanding can have a significant impact on a child's life, especially during challenging times. Despite their own relationship struggles, both Jaackmaate and Steven Bartlett highlight the importance of their fathers in providing guidance and emotional support. Both fathers recognized their children's passions, whether it was YouTube or football, and supported them unconditionally. Their fathers' belief in them gave Jaackmaate and Steven the confidence to pursue their dreams and navigate through difficult situations. This conversation emphasizes the value of a strong parental bond, where open communication and trust create a safe space for children to express themselves and seek guidance. It underscores the importance of parents being present and understanding, even in the face of personal hardships.

Growing Through Distance and Separation

Sometimes, distance and separation can lead to personal growth and mental wellbeing. Jaackmaate reflects on his parents' turbulent relationship and how it affected him as a child. Despite witnessing his mother's rejection of his father, he felt relieved when his father left and found a new partner. This change brought him a sense of stability and a safe space to express himself. Jaackmaate also acknowledges that his strained relationship with his mother contributed to his emotional and mental well-being. While he wonders about the reasons behind his mother's behavior, he recognizes that his life has improved without her presence. This conversation demonstrates the importance of recognizing toxic relationships and making choices that promote personal growth and happiness.

The Influence of Home Life on Personal Growth

Home life can have a significant impact on a person's school performance and development. Jaackmaate believed that his desire to fit in and be the center of attention stemmed from early childhood experiences. He also shared instances of turmoil at home, like physical abuse and the destruction of personal belongings, which affected his emotional well-being. However, having YouTube as an outlet allowed Jaackmaate to overcome these struggles and find his identity. He acknowledged that he actively worked to avoid inheriting the negative traits of his parents, while also recognizing that he still carried some of their negative characteristics. Overall, this conversation highlights the importance of understanding the influence of home life on personal growth and navigating one's path to success.

Acknowledging Negative Traits and Finding Genuine Purpose

Jaackmaate recognizes the negative traits he has inherited from his parents, especially his anger issues. Although he attended anger management classes in school, he admits that it was for something he didn't do. Despite not benefiting directly from those classes, he believes they were necessary for his personal growth and to avoid potential trouble in the future. Jaackmaate also acknowledges that his earlier YouTube content was fueled by fake anger and targeted other YouTubers for views, rather than genuine concern. As he has matured, he realizes the importance of having a genuine purpose and not falling into the trap of seeking out negativity for the sake of it. While he regrets some of his videos, he believes that there was humor and a valid reason behind most of his content, even though it may not have always been authentic. Ultimately, his journey towards self-reflection and personal growth has resulted in him mellowing out and becoming more mature.

Jaackmaate's Journey to Authenticity and Self-Reflection on YouTube

Jaackmaate reflects on his past behavior on YouTube and acknowledges that he was not being true to himself. He admits to intentionally picking flaws in others' work to gain views and revenue, even though deep down, he wanted to be part of the YouTube boxing team and had admiration for his fellow creators. Jaackmaate realizes that his actions stemmed from a desire to fit in and be recognized by the YouTube community. However, as he matured, he recognized the importance of authenticity and being genuine. He now feels content with where he is in his career, having built his own podcast. This conversation highlights the significance of self-reflection and personal growth in finding success and happiness.

Appreciating the Journey: Finding Fulfillment in the Process

The journey towards a goal can be more fulfilling and enjoyable than actually reaching the goal itself. Jaackmaate's experience with YouTube and his journey towards buying a house highlighted the concept of arrival fallacy, where achieving a long-desired goal can lead to feelings of emptiness and lack of purpose. This phenomenon is seen in various fields, such as sports and Olympians experiencing depressive symptoms after winning a gold medal. The conversation reminds us that true happiness and fulfillment come from the process, the small victories along the way, and the novelty of new experiences. It reinforces the idea that finding joy in the journey is essential for staying motivated and finding long-term satisfaction.

Finding Purpose, Freedom, and Happiness through Wealth

Having a sense of purpose and the freedom to do what you want when you want is essential for happiness. Money can buy freedom, which in turn brings happiness. It allows you to help and support your loved ones, providing them with the things they need or want. It's not just about material possessions, but about being able to make a positive impact on the lives of others. Finding fulfillment in helping others and experiencing those moments of gratitude and appreciation is more valuable than any material possession. It's about using your success and resources to create a better life for yourself and those around you.

The Power of Financial Freedom in Finding Happiness

Freedom ultimately leads to happiness. Steven Bartlett emphasizes how the absence of financial freedom caused immense stress and anxiety in his life. He vividly recalls receiving bailiff letters and struggling to afford basic necessities. However, once he gained financial freedom, he experienced a significant shift in happiness. Furthermore, both Steven and Jaackmaate discuss the importance of money when it comes to taking care of loved ones during difficult times, such as paying for hospital bills or providing security measures for family members. This conversation highlights the notion that having money provides opportunities to support those we care about, which can bring a sense of fulfillment and purpose.

The Guilt and Struggle of Imposter Syndrome in a Successful YouTuber's Journey

Jaackmaate feels a sense of guilt and struggle with imposter syndrome as a successful YouTuber. He attributes this to witnessing other YouTubers take their success for granted and assuming it as their right. However, Jaackmaate maintains his connection to his working-class upbringing and strives not to lose touch with the hard work it took to achieve his success. He believes that he has earned his accomplishments but hesitates to fully accept it. Additionally, Jaackmaate finds fulfillment in helping others and providing opportunities for those around him. He recognizes the importance of his team and credits their support in his journey. Despite having a large subscriber count, he acknowledges that losing motivation can be a challenge for many people to understand.

Staying true to oneself and following genuine passions for long-term satisfaction.

Jaackmaate realized that he had to stay true to himself and his passions. He felt that his main YouTube channel was no longer reflecting who he was and what he wanted to create. Instead, he found his passion and fulfillment in his podcast and other projects that aligned with his true self. Jaackmaate recognized the importance of having a clear and obvious reason or purpose behind his content and not just chasing after quick profits. He acknowledged the struggle of sustaining something that goes against who you truly are, and how eventually it becomes wearing and heavy. Through this conversation, we can understand the significance of staying authentic and following our genuine passions for long-term satisfaction.

The Impact of Online Criticism and Trolling on Mental Well-being

Both Steven Bartlett and Jaackmaate have experienced the negative effects of online criticism and trolling. They discuss how comments and trolls can affect them mentally and emotionally, even if they try to dismiss it. Jaackmaate realizes that continuously criticizing and mocking others can cross the line into bullying, and he wants to be viewed as a comedian rather than a bully. They both admit to feeling a rush from engaging with trolls, but recognize the importance of not letting it consume them. They also acknowledge that jealousy may play a role in online hate. Ultimately, the conversation highlights the need for control over one's emotions and perceptions in order to navigate the online world successfully.

The Challenges of Managing Audience Behavior and Expectations as an Influencer

As an influencer, Jaackmaate is faced with the challenge of managing the behavior and expectations of his audience. While he tries to maintain professionalism and represent his work with West Ham, he also faces criticism and negative comments from his followers. Steven Bartlett suggests that Jaackmaate may have cultivated a younger male audience that uses colloquial and comedic language, which may explain the type of comments he receives. However, this also means that Jaackmaate is vulnerable to attacks from his own audience, which can become personal and hurtful. The conversation highlights the complexity of being an influencer and the emotional toll it can take, as Jaackmaate admits to feeling triggered and finding it difficult to resist responding to negative comments.

From College Passion to Notable Guests: Jaackmaate's Journey in Podcasting

Jaackmaate's decision to start doing long-form podcasts was driven by his passion for interviewing people, which he had nurtured since his college days. Despite facing initial challenges with his first podcast, he persisted and eventually found his love for YouTube again through guest interviews. A pivotal moment came when he had the opportunity to interview Ricky Gervais, who had been supportive of Jaackmaate's career from the beginning, leading to more notable guests and credibility for the show. Furthermore, Jaackmaate's honesty about the importance of money in his decision-making process, as seen in his deal with Spotify, has contributed to the trust and admiration people have for him.

From YouTube to Spotify: Jaackmaate's Financial Decision

Jaackmaate made the decision to sign an exclusive deal with Spotify for financial reasons. Initially, he was concerned about the potential backlash of removing full visual episodes from YouTube and transitioning to an audio-based platform. However, when Spotify presented him with the financial benefits, he saw it as an opportunity to change not just his life, but also his children's future. A year into the deal, Jaackmaate is starting to see the benefits, such as getting guests that he wouldn't have been able to book on his own. Additionally, Spotify offered him the option to have the full video on their platform, but he decided against it due to financial considerations. This conversation also touched upon the debate of moving the video content to Spotify, with the conclusion that YouTube viewers and Spotify listeners are different demographics. Finally, Jaackmaate expressed his vision of doing a live show for Happy Hour in the next 5 to 10 years, although he emphasized the importance of making sure it's the right opportunity.

Overcoming Mental Health Struggles: Jaackmaate's Honest Journey

Mental health battles can significantly impact one's life and daily routines. Jaackmaate openly shared his struggles with health anxiety and OCD, revealing the challenges he faces on a regular basis. He discussed how his anxiety about his health led to excessive drinking as a temporary escape, but ultimately worsened his mental state. Jaackmaate also highlighted the specific rituals and fears associated with his OCD, such as his inability to touch or look at certain parts of his body. These vivid examples demonstrate the overwhelming nature of mental health disorders and the impact they can have on one's daily life. It serves as a reminder to prioritize mental well-being and seek appropriate support and treatment when necessary.

Living with OCD and Health Anxiety: A Candid Conversation

Mental health disorders, such as OCD and health anxiety, can have a significant impact on a person's life. Jaackmaate candidly shares how his OCD manifests in obsessions over time, sunsets, and the fear of having cancer. He also highlights the importance of being open and honest about these experiences, as it can help others who may be going through similar struggles. While therapy and seeking professional help are recommended, Jaackmaate admits his own fear of confirmation, which prevents him from seeking medical advice. Despite this, he stresses the significance of addressing mental health concerns and encourages others to seek assistance if needed. Overall, this conversation sheds light on the complexities of living with OCD and health anxiety.

Coping with Mental Health Struggles: A Personal Journey

Living with mental health struggles, such as anxiety and OCD, can be incredibly challenging. The individual, Jaackmaate, expresses his fear of confirmation of his illness and the constant need to escape intrusive thoughts. He shares that he turns to alcohol as a form of self-medication and distraction. The significance of the sun rising for him is that it represents a fresh start and a momentary relief from his worries. His obsessive-compulsive tendencies, such as obsessing over the time and needing to turn his phone on at specific intervals, further highlight the difficulties he faces. Ultimately, this conversation sheds light on the unique and sometimes unusual coping mechanisms individuals may develop to deal with their mental health struggles.

The Importance of a Supportive Relationship in Overcoming Challenges

Having a strong support system can make dealing with difficult thoughts and challenges much easier. Jaackmaate expresses the importance of his partner, who listens to him and supports him during his moments of vulnerability. Despite their differences, she stands by him and provides the encouragement he needs to face his fears and overcome obstacles. Her presence and understanding help him navigate his anxieties and continue pursuing his career. Having someone who believes in you and pushes you to step out of your comfort zone can be incredibly valuable in times of self-doubt. It highlights the power of a supportive relationship and the impact it can have on one's mental well-being.

The Power of a Supportive Partner and the Importance of Relationships

Having a supportive partner who prioritizes love, connection, and family can have a profound impact on one's personal growth and happiness. Both Jaackmaate and Steven Bartlett express immense admiration for their respective partners, acknowledging the difference they have made in their lives. The conversation highlights the importance of valuing relationships beyond material success and focusing on what truly matters. It also touches upon the fear and hesitation some individuals may have when considering starting a family, as it requires sacrifices and changes in priorities. Ultimately, the key takeaway is that finding a balance between personal ambition and maintaining strong relationships can lead to a fulfilling and meaningful life.

Discovering Talent and Passion for Connecting and Entertaining

Jaackmaate has discovered his talent and passion for talking and connecting with people. He realizes that he can speak to most people on their level, whether it's KSI or Deborah Meaden, and make them laugh. Although he may not consider himself the best YouTuber or presenter, he believes he excels in podcasting and has found what he loves and is good at. Steven Bartlett also acknowledges Jaackmaate's talent, stating that he is more talented than he gives himself credit for. They discuss Jaackmaate's potential in stand-up comedy, and he shares his positive experience performing stand-up, where he was able to confidently engage with the audience and make them laugh. Overall, the key takeaway is that Jaackmaate has found his niche and talent in connecting and entertaining through talking.

The Power of Vulnerability and Openness in Inspiring Personal Growth and Connection

Being vulnerable and open about one's struggles can have a profound impact on both the individual and the audience. Jaackmaate's willingness to share his experiences and emotions not only helps him in his personal growth and therapy but also lifts the weight off others who resonate with his story. Steven Bartlett acknowledges the power of authenticity and encourages more people to embrace vulnerability in order to find liberation and connection. It is through this openness that individuals can inspire and impact thousands of people, creating a ripple effect of empathy and understanding. This conversation highlights the importance of self-awareness, maturity, and the potential for personal growth through sharing one's journey.